Married Life, The Blog!

Monday, May 5, 2008 The First Year. Married Life is not easy, that's for sure! It is the blending of two unique individuals into one family unit. Just because you are madly in love with your spouse, does not mean you will agree on the best way to fold the laundry or make a meatball! My first year of marriage was very stressful. I was only 24 years old, had never really lived away from my parents, and had been under the impression that married life would mean happily ever after, like Cinderella or Snow White. We went to New Orleans on our honeymoon, and believe it or not, I was actually looking forward to coming home to Pennsylvania to get started on our "real life." (Geez, I should have enjoyed the honeymoon more! Can I go back in time please???) I couldn't wait to be the Mrs. of our little, tiny condo.

Well, it didn't take long before the fighting began. First, my husband told me that I was making my hamburgers all wrong. This led to the biggest fight we've ever had. We still refer back to it. It has it's own title in our life history, "The Hamburger Fight!" We actually stooped so low as to throw hamburgers at each other! How we ever got over it, I can't quite remember. I probably started crying, and he probably apologized. I'm sure I told him how hard I was trying to make him a nice dinner, and I also probably told him if he didn't like my cooking then he'd have to do it all for himself from now on!

Three months after our vows I discovered I was pregnant. Sure, I'd always wanted babies...but so soon? I wasn't even 25 yet, after all. Still, I couldn't contain my excitement. I was going to be a Mom. My husband, on the other hand, was worried and insecure about being a father. At 24, he still wanted to party and have fun. I knew we'd have to grow up fast, but he resisted.

The first year was a major adjustment period. A new beginning in many ways. New marriage. New baby. New home. New way of life. Despite the ups and downs, we survived by never giving up on each other. No matter how bad the hamburger fight, we hung in there. We may have been young, but we knew the stakes. We really didn't ever want to lose each other, or the dream we had of building a family and a life together. We took our vows seriously. Ultimately, we didn't want to be failures! (My parents spent a lot of money on that wedding! I can't even imagine having told them it was for nothing and leaving my husband!)

Every year is an adjustment period in some way. I expect it now. That's the bottom line...don't expect that things will be easy. Hope for the best, of course, and be positive and optimistic, but expect that it takes hard work to get happiness in marriage. It's not easy even in the best of marriages. And that's OK because the things in life that are of the most value, take the hardest work to achieve, like a good, solid marriage.

Posted by ShannonM at 8:39 PM 0 comments Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)

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